By Raiza Giorgi

publisher@santaynezvalleystar.com

Parents are having to stay home with their children all day, every day because schools are practicing distance learning, all the while working if they can from home. Let’s just say work has become … well … interesting.
I typically work from home anyway and try to get the majority of my interviews done during the day while the kids are at school, but I am also now having to teach them while simultaneously working. There are many times I’m having to start my interviews with, “Please understand you might hear my kids in the background,” or maybe even mute them while asking kids to quiet down a little. 

I reached out to some of my friends online and asked them to do a fun activity with me, to replace the word kid or child and use coworker to see what responses would be. 

Here’s mine:

“My coworkers like to have wrestling matches loudly right when I am on a press conference and have just been unmuted to ask a serious question.” 

I hope these other answers from local parents have you entertained as well. If you have a good one, let us know at news@santaynezvalleystar.com!

Zdena J. 

“I’ve been sleeping with my coworker for years and now she decided to move on and sleep in her own bed. I’m happy for her growing independence and I miss her so much at the same time.” 

David M. 

“My coworker laughs at me one moment and then eats my food. I think my coworker is a bully.”

Lea M. 

“I was fired. My ‘co-workers’ complained to upper management (dad) about their workload and Instead of talking through it — a tonka truck was thrown at me, while violently being screamed at by the 3ft real BOSS.” 

Alisse H. 

“My coworker was yelling ‘ewwwwwww! Cooper (the dog) farted!!!’ while on a conference call with CDC and the State.” 

Jaime M.

“My coworker demands I get him snacks all day. (I think he might have an eating problem). All he says to me is ‘I’m hungry!’ Then he makes a mess all over the floor and expects me to pick it all up!”

Maudia R. 

“My coworker showed up and worked in her underwear all day… both my coworkers slept in my bed last night.” 

Elizabeth H. 

“I came inside from letting the puppy out and found one of my coworkers laying half naked on the ground and the other standing above with a diaper in hand and said, ‘My coworker needed her diaper changed.’”

Kelly F. 

“My coworkers started singing a song called ‘poop in your pants’ when I was on a phone call.” 

Amanda M. 

“My coworker sat on my lap, pressed a bunch of keys on my keyboard, and sent an unexplainable email to the CFO. The CFO responded back with ‘I hope you’re enjoying time with your coworker, he looks like he’s learning a lot about our business! Future CFO!’”

Carey B. 

“My coworker makes me wipe her bottom.”

Richard G. 

“My coworker peed on the floor then slipped in it and started crying while trying to stand back up. I felt so bad for her. My other coworker thought it was hilarious.”

Cheri G. 

“My coworker was under other management today and unrolled an entire roll of toilet paper today… in the bathroom … thousands of dollars worth of TP spread all over – we are trying to salvage some of the damage!”

Kristen R. 

“My coworker took the rubber base off the chair leg from the kitchen chairs, filled it up in the dog’s water dish, and drank from it like a cup.”

Kathleen D. 

“I have three coworkers, we’re a busy office. They say I’m the boss but I think management got it wrong when I applied for the position…I’m clearly not the boss. The other day one of my coworkers screamed at me for an Apple, and when I gave him an apple, he took a bite and then threw it AT me, hitting me in the leg saying “I DON’T WANT AN APPLE!” I wonder where the complaints department is, so I can report a hostile work environment?”

Abigail E. 

“My coworker peed on the couch.”